Held captive by a relationship?
Whom do you try to avoid? An ex-employee? An estranged relative? An ex-associate? An especially demanding client? An ex-boss? Someone you just can’t stand being around? (Please, please, please don’t let it be me!!!!!!!!!!!)
You have allowed that person to imprison you.
It looks as if you’re in control, orchestrating your life so you won’t encounter them, expending massive amounts of energy in the process. Instead of being at ease, you’re on guard. Instead of fully living, you find yourself continually defensive; on the lookout.
Eliminate this kryptonite from your life. It’s based on the lie that this person “does” something to you. When in fact, whatever your reaction is, you do it to yourself. You create the uncomfortableness. You create the feelings of inferiority. You create the sense of dread. Or resentment. And massive amounts of emotional stress that feed back on your body causing/aggravating back pain, carpal tunnel, heart disease, diabetes, sciatica, take you pick of another million or so disorders.
If the person who is the source of all this angst lacks positive qualities (unlikely) then at least chose to become indifferent and lose the shackles.
Take out a piece of paper and write their name on it. Crumple it up and throw it away. Get the thought of them out of your life. Unless of course it’s me. If it is; please, please accept my most sincere apology. If I or we’ve ever offended you, it was not on purpose. I know to many of you this may come as a surprise, but I am not infallible. If you are in pain, don’t suffer because of something I may have said, done or failed to.